Friday, February 13, 2015

Fifty Shades of "Gray"

I’m just goin’ to cut to the chase…

I don’t give a flying fart1 about “Fifty Shades of Grey”.

There I said it. Hope I didn’t offend2

In all seriousness… there’s a lot of talk goin’ on about the erotic romance novel and drama porn film.

But I suppose this isn’t necessarily a bad thing. After all, talking about purity and pornography should be encouraged in a time where sexual compromise is at an all-time high.

Granted, it’s heartbreaking to come back to these issues only to find more people wearing blinders3 covering their sensitivity to graphic eroticism and relational abuse.

But I mean…think about it. Just because culture glorifies the fetish doesn’t mean my opinion belief in awe-fully4, amazing sex, as God intended, is invalid.

Sure, I may be “old school” in the eyes of some, but at the end of the day, for something to be good, it also has to be right, just, pure, and honorable (Philippians 4:8).

And I’m sorry, but I’m not going to naively waste my breath claiming “Fifty Shades of Grey” is any of those things.

Now, I’ll be honest: I’m not an expert in BDSM5, but what I do know is:

  • Consent doesn’t make an action appropriate.
  • Sadism is not sexy.
  • Bondage is the exact opposite of what we were created for.

And while I could go on, the point is it makes no sense to devalue the very things we were designed for.

Love, honor, respect, freedom…I mean, common, people! I know these liberties don’t sell, but at the end of the day, we have to understand God made us communal, not commercial.

And hear me, I love being turned on6. Dare I say arousal is a huge part of our original design7.

But just like Sodom and Gomorrah, when we pervert the good and holy, we’re essentially prostituting ourselves to captivity and destruction.


People who justify “Fifty Shades of Grey” based on the idea we need to be reminded how sex is this mind-blowing, intoxicating experience…

…are you sincerely concerned the majority of the population has succumbed to thinking sex isn’t this?

Or are you simply trying to justify your desire to emotionally "excite"?

And look…I’m not trying to judge; I’m only trying to speak the truth in love (which for the record, isn’t legalistic).

I guess, my question is: for those who claim being in the BDSM world isn’t a bad thing, who should we be advocating for - the right to enjoy whatever you want or the right to human deceny as beings created in the image of God?

Also, for those who are defending the movie based on its supposed “happy ending”…are you not admitting its proceeding parts to be completely erroneous? And for those who claim there is a “moral” to the story, are you actually suggesting sadistic mentalities are acceptable as long as the submissive party is somehow able to convert the dominator?

‘Cause I got news for you: in the real world, that doesn’t happen.

I mean…seriously. Who are we to think we can change the human heart?

‘Cause while it’s human to crave control, only God has the power to change the sadist and masochist…and perhaps more of us would get this if we stopped blurring the line between fiction and reality.

No matter how you slice it, you can't justify a toleration of abuse (regardless of its form) for the sake of cinematic titillation.

I know many think all is well as long as there’s a satisfying resolution (i.e. as long as Christian and Anastasia fall in love and “live happily ever after”).8

But I’m telling you, whether we’re talking the explicitly erotic scenes or the BDSM issue, you’re playing with fire if you think even a little is acceptable.

My advice? Say “nay” to the “Grey”...and flirt away from lust.

Not only will you be safeguarding your heart from lust and impurity9, but you’ll be putting yourself in better position to know what real love looks like.

And with Valentine’s Day just around the corner, who couldn’t use a fresh reminder of what put us here in the first place?

Look…I know this blog was a heavy-hitter.

But I also know as a husband of a beautiful wife, when it comes to valuing and treating a woman with utmost love and respect, I'd rather have 20/20 vision than have blinders on.

That’s all.

‘Til then, keep your eyes on the prize…and know though love has no limits…
…true love never fails.10
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Footnotes

1 - Shout-out to Olan Rogers
2 - Sarcasm
3 - Pardon the ironic metaphor
4 - Word credit: Focus on the Family
5 - Seems like this should be the official hashtag of the movie if you ask me
6 - Whoa…I can’t believe I just said that!
7 - Side note: Why is the western church making any talk of sexual intimacy taboo, anyway? Maybe we’ve helped inadvertently fuel this fire?
8 - Some also justify the content by claiming Anastasia is able to teach Christian how to love in the end; the problem with this arguable is: you gotta know love to teach love.
9 - Which has a way to creep in subconsciously
10 - More specifically, love is always patient, always protects, always trusts, is never self-seeking, etc.

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2 comments:

Jan Ferguson said...

Brave and valid words!

Cameron Fry said...

Thanks, Jan. I appreciate the encouragement.